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Unrealistic Expectations

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Offline slade

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Unrealistic Expectations
« on: December 06, 2009, 06:47:21 AM »
I will try and keep this one short. I am concerned about my expectations for the surgery. I have my date in 10 days now and have viewed hundreds of pictures on this site and others. I want to be happy with my results though but I have a history of being my own worst enemy and quite the harsh critic. Everyones body is different but what can I do to make sure I don't get to wrapped up in this delusion of coming out chiseled and perfectly sculpted? I keep telling myself to be real but don't know if I have quite grasped that yet.

Linkback: https://www.gynecomastia.org/smf/index.php?topic=19564.0

Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #1 on: December 06, 2009, 04:43:35 PM »
well if you haven't grasped it yet....DO SO...cause it's not gon be perfect at first...there's a healing process man!  Always expect the worse and hope for the best...




Fluffy( o )v( o )...
My before and after surgery pics: Leave a comment if you look!! (HAD THE WRONG LINK UP! THIS IS THE ONE WITH ALL THE PICS)
http://www.gynecomastia.org/smf/index.php?topic=19342.0

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Offline headheldhigh01

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Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #2 on: December 06, 2009, 05:14:00 PM »
rule one is everybody freaks out, any swelling or scarring will appear after it looks flatter at first.  final results could take from a month to half a year or even more.  it also might depend a little on whether you have just a little gland or a larger case.  but as long as you know the game beforehand, you're better prepared to deal with it during recovery. 
* a man is more than a body will ever tell
* if it screws up your life the same, is there really any such thing as "mild" gyne?

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DrBermant

Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #3 on: December 06, 2009, 06:26:03 PM »
I will try and keep this one short. I am concerned about my expectations for the surgery. I have my date in 10 days now and have viewed hundreds of pictures on this site and others. I want to be happy with my results though but I have a history of being my own worst enemy and quite the harsh critic. Everyones body is different but what can I do to make sure I don't get to wrapped up in this delusion of coming out chiseled and perfectly sculpted? I keep telling myself to be real but don't know if I have quite grasped that yet.

Realistic expectations are the key to success. However, the before / after images you should be checking would be the ones of the surgeon you have chosen. Expecting images from other web sites to represent your doctor's results are a major mistake. The images on my site are typical of my results for my patients. If you cannot find such images on that doctor's site or office and need to depend on finding images here in this forum: that could be a problem.  If the images on this site of that doctor do not look like what they have on their site: that could be a different problem.

This is real surgery and it has real limitations.  Expectations beyond that can be destructive to potential happiness.

Hope this helps,

Michael Bermant, MD
Learn More About Gynecomastia and Male Breast Reduction

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Offline Grandpa Bambu

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Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2009, 11:34:36 AM »
I don't get to wrapped up in this delusion of coming out chiseled and perfectly sculpted?

By the sounds of it dude, you are aware of the fact that your post-op chest will not look like Arnold's in his prime, and that surgery is just a 'Fix', not a 'Cure'. Sounds like you know the score! You'll be okay...  ;)

The purpose of GRS (Gynecomastic Reduction Surgery) im my opinion, is to provide the sufferer with a more manageable life. Not to give the sufferer a chest that will look as if he never had G in the first place... As I mentioned above, GRS is only a 'fix', not a 'cure'.  At the end of the day, surgeons are just mere mortals. They are not magicians or wizards/witches that can cast a spell over you and your G will magically disappear...

The sufferer who is contemplating GRS, must realize that all surgeries have their inherent risks. One of the risks of this surgery is that there may be irregularities. Irregularities such as concavities or visible scars. Surgeons do their best to minimize the potential of irregularities but in most cases, they cannot make it perfect...

Achieving your 'ideal' of surgery results may be next to impossible...  Keep your expectations 'real', and you'll be okay...

GB...
Surgery: February 16, 2005. - Toronto, Ontario Canada.
Surgeon: Dr. John Craig Fielding   M.D.   F.R.C.S. (C) (416.766.8890)
Pre-Op/Post-Op Pics

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Offline slade

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Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #5 on: December 07, 2009, 03:31:49 PM »
I don't get to wrapped up in this delusion of coming out chiseled and perfectly sculpted?

By the sounds of it dude, you are aware of the fact that your post-op chest will not look like Arnold's in his prime, and that surgery is just a 'Fix', not a 'Cure'. Sounds like you know the score! You'll be okay...  ;)

The purpose of GRS (Gynecomastic Reduction Surgery) im my opinion, is to provide the sufferer with a more manageable life. Not to give the sufferer a chest that will look as if he never had G in the first place... As I mentioned above, GRS is only a 'fix', not a 'cure'.  At the end of the day, surgeons are just mere mortals. They are not magicians or wizards/witches that can cast a spell over you and your G will magically disappear...

The sufferer who is contemplating GRS, must realize that all surgeries have their inherent risks. One of the risks of this surgery is that there may be irregularities. Irregularities such as concavities or visible scars. Surgeons do their best to minimize the potential of irregularities but in most cases, they cannot make it perfect...

Achieving your 'ideal' of surgery results may be next to impossible...  Keep your expectations 'real', and you'll be okay...

GB...
You make it sound like this surgery doesn't yield any REAL results. I have sen many perfectly satisfied people with this surgery. Many are able to work out to get the body they always wanted. How then, scars aside can you say that it is not a cure? I understand the surgery doesn't make you ripped but it should take care of what you can't with hard work and exercise. Am I wrong. I want to be realistic but you make it sound like I'm only gonna get so so results. Nothing substantial. I'm going in to get the surgery so I can be flat enough that I can let weights do the rest. Nothing personal dude but being realistic is one thing but you almost have a pessimistic approaching this surgery. It really kills my self esteem. Makes me think my so called realistic results will always fall short

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Offline slade

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Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #6 on: December 07, 2009, 05:13:27 PM »
Commenting on your first post. Believe it or not grandpa it was your results that gave me a more optimistic outlook on the surgery. I have been sweating bullet becaus I feared that those those with a condition were destined for revisions and skin exision surgery. I thought I wa doomed. Only after seeing all your pictures was I given some hope.

Your condition was very similar to mine. Being able to view your photo gallery and watching the progression of your healing put a lot of my fears at ease. Finally someon like me who in my opinion received phenominal results from there surgery. I know we all have different bodies but results similar to yours is what I'm shooting for.

I don't understand why you don't view it as a cure. Looking at your 6mth photos I would not have been able to tell you ever had it. How is that not a cure.

I just needed to find what I viewed to be one sucess from someone similar to me. Gotta hold onto something. You look great man. Here's hoping I get dealt an equally good hand.

Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #7 on: December 07, 2009, 08:26:08 PM »
My surgery is booked for Friday.  And yes, I'm freaking out too.  I wonder if there's anybody who doesn't freak out before surgery.

Can't wait until it's over and I hopefully I can finally look normal again ;D

Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #8 on: December 07, 2009, 09:19:29 PM »
Quote
Everyones body is different but what can I do to make sure I don't get to wrapped up in this delusion of coming out chiseled and perfectly sculpted? I keep telling myself to be real but don't know if I have quite grasped that yet.

Everyone going into gyne surgery has some idea in the back of his mind that he will emerge with a chest worthy of the cover of "Muscle and Fitness."  Unfortunately, it doesn't always turn out that way.  There are just too many variables, many of which are not under the control of the patient or the surgeon.  Thus, if you are looking for and anticipating a perfect result, more than likely prepare yourself to be disappointed.

And if you feel that you haven't "grasped" that concept yet, then it might be better to put off the surgery or have a real heart-to-heart talk with your surgeon.  The worst result for you would be to have surgery with a 99% result and be dissatisfied because it wasn't 100%.

Dr Jacobs
Dr. Jacobs 
Certified: American Board of Plastic Surgery
Fellow: American College of Surgeons
Practice sub-specialty in Gynecomastia Surgery
815 Park Avenue
New York, New York 10021
Telephone:  (212) 570-6080
Email:  dr.j@elliotjacobsmd.com
Website:  http://www.gynecomastiasurgery.com
Website:  http://www.gynecomastianewyork.com/revi

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Offline Grandpa Bambu

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Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #9 on: December 07, 2009, 11:52:10 PM »
I don't understand why you don't view it as a cure. Looking at your 6mth photos I would not have been able to tell you ever had it. How is that not a cure.

All I'm trying to point out is that GRS (Gynecomastic Reduction Surgery) is just a fix and not, for some, a procedure that will give you a 'Perfect' chest. In many cases, there can be some irregularities from surgery. It's these irregularities that some guys find unacceptable. These guys want their chests to look 'Perfect'. Which is understandable... In many cases, results will not be 'Perfect'. My surgery results are not 'Perfect'. I have a concavity on the LHS and there are very slight scars. I highly doubt anyone would notice these imperfections, but they are there none-the-less. However, I am 46 years old and have been married for 18 years. I'm not in a position of trying to impress anyone. Someone in their late teens / early to mid 20's may have other intentions... They, want their chest to look as if they have never had G at all. For many, this just isn't the case...

Sure, surgery can yield REAL results. Results, not perfection.

I don't see myself being pessimistic at all dude... Surgery can provide great relief from the G curse... Surgery can make life for the sufferer much more manageable... Surgery can be a life changer!!!

You just have to have Realistic Expectaitons...  ;)

GB...

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Offline Grandpa Bambu

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Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #10 on: December 08, 2009, 12:07:31 AM »
Thus, if you are looking for and anticipating a perfect result, more than likely prepare yourself to be disappointed.

The worst result for you would be to have surgery with a 99% result and be dissatisfied because it wasn't 100%.


This is what I was trying to convey to slade...  If we use a word such as 'cure', then people will associate that with '100% Perfection'...   

'Strive for' perfection, but be willing to accept 'improvement'...

GB...

Re: Unrealistic Expectations
« Reply #11 on: December 12, 2009, 04:03:23 PM »
This is exactly how I see it, I do not want a perfect chest after the operation - I want a better chest then the one I have now, if my chest became flat and my nipples returned to normal size that would be all I care about. I do not think for a second that my chest is going to look like some celebrity who works out 6 hours a day, 6 days a week and has his/her own chef in the kitchen. But I want to be able to wear a white t shirt (tight) without seeing protruding nipples coming out. That is all...
op pictures: - 12th of December 2009 surgery
http://www.gynecomastia.org/smf/index.php?topic=19668.0


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