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Your life's Arc

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Your life's Arc
« on: September 06, 2012, 11:25:13 PM »
All good stories have an arc. It's defined as "The purpose of a story arc is to move a character or a situation from one state to another; in other words, to affect change."

I started this thread for members to share a moment in their life that caused their life to change. If the most important one is too personal, feel free to share one that you are comfortable with.

Linkback: https://www.gynecomastia.org/smf/index.php?topic=26285.0

Re: Your life's Arc
« Reply #1 on: September 06, 2012, 11:41:26 PM »
I have a few. But undoubtedly the one that impacted/changed me the most was being victimized by a predator at an all boys camp at age 10. It led to a full decade of self destructive and self loathing behaviors. I had no ability to trust friends, family, or authority.

The real arc came when I found a way to turn it all around. Ive learned look at myself critically and understand some of what I perceive is a result of the trauma I endured. I am also now able to discuss what happened with 2 close friends and in forums... which is a huge step for me considering I havent told anyone for 14 years.

Ive never been happier- having made peace with myself.

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Offline Paa_Paw

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Re: Your life's Arc
« Reply #2 on: September 07, 2012, 06:55:26 PM »
Born in 1937, Cosmetically acceptable effective and safe surgery was not available until I was almost 50 years old. Obviously I could not plan on surgery, I had to learn to live with what I had.

My own father was an abusive man who was not a good example in many ways. There were several men who were good examples though. Two among them stand out. (No names here of course) First was my Scoutmaster, Second was a Junior High School Print Shop instructor. They encouragd me to get into competitive wrestling and to stand up for myself. I was taught that if a bully does not get away with teasing you he will find another victim. While still in High School I had a guy grab at my breasts.. He suffered a dislocated shoulder and I never got teased again.

I entered the Air Force but again found that bullies need victims and I did not have to be a victim. They left me alone.

After the Air Force, I became a Police Officer. When the Deputy Chief Pinned the Badge to my shirt he stood back and said "Now heres a lad what wears his Badge Proudly." Yes, I had a good laugh too. (You might see what an old definition for the word "proud" means so you too can laugh.)

I learned to not take myself too seriously and to not worry about things I could not change.

Safe and effective surgery is now the case so what would I do if I was given enough money to cover the cost of surgery? I'd most likely use it for a down payment on a sailboat. Gynecomastia ceased to be a priority for me many years ago.
Grandpa Dan

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Offline headheldhigh01

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Re: Your life's Arc
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2012, 04:05:46 AM »
i had pretty uneven early experiences, in spite of living in an affluent country, but the two events that most shaped my life did not do so openly, yet they were more powerful than obvious things.  the first was discovering what gyne is and that it was not remissioned cancer as i had mistakenly believed it for years.  that was nearly ten years ago.  because of all that rested on this mistake, it was like a bomb going off in what passed for my life. 

the second was only a few months earlier when the girlfriend i was madly in love with died. gyne plus a non-physical complication forced me to sideline the relationship against my strongly opposed will, allowing me to spend two intervals in hell, the first while she went out with probably close to every guy she met, and the second when i was told she died, since i foolishly had faith that things would still work out.  i didn't change jobs or move at the time, but these experiences radically shifted the ground under my worldviews. 

i can get by easier than paa_paw, my case is not severe, but i still wish to get the op someday (personal circumstances kind of keep coming up in ways that interfere).  as crazy as it sounds, between me and gyne, you could say it's now personal. 
* a man is more than a body will ever tell
* if it screws up your life the same, is there really any such thing as "mild" gyne?


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