Gynecomastia Forum, Doctor and Surgery Resources

Gynecomastia Acceptance => Acceptance Garments => Topic started by: expedient-traveller on January 25, 2016, 09:52:36 PM

Title: Acceptance by others
Post by: expedient-traveller on January 25, 2016, 09:52:36 PM
This area seems to be the best area for this so here it goes: I needed to work on my sisters truck today and she has not seen me since my breasts grew to their current size 44D/DD. I was very concerned that she would get all freaked out but when I explained to her how it happened and they are mine till death (will never go under the knife), she accepted them as no big deal and then we began to share all sorts of information about all sorts of stuff. She gave me some advice on bras and health while I repaired her truck. Afterwards she took me out to dinner. We are closer now than we have been in many years. I was certain wearing a tighter more comfortable shirt which leaves nothing to the imagination would put her off somehow but she was fine.
The point behind this is what everyone has been saying all along: people are not freaked out by us having breasts. They take it as something that happens...perhaps their reaction is based on how we react to our breasts. Be well all.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: Alchemist on January 26, 2016, 01:44:17 AM
Quite right.  I've lived that way for decades and added T-shirts last year. Everybody knows about it now and it is just one of those things.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: aboywithgirls on January 26, 2016, 06:22:16 AM
This sounds very similar to my sister and myself. However, when I was 13, I had started wearing her bras that she had out grown. Not sneaking or "borrowing ". My breasts development started early and it was decided that surgery should not be done at that time until  they stopped developing. 
Fast forward 30 years, we are both in the same size. We're about the same build. She is very supportive and understanding. She said that she wouldn't go bra less  either. 
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: hammer on January 26, 2016, 06:37:33 AM
As I said the other day in another post, I told my youngest daughter new boyfriend that I wear a bra to support the breast that he has known for years that I had, as they have been friends for since college and was aware of my health issues! He said a guys gotta do what he's gotta do to take care of himself.

I had also told him about our saying that a bra is made to support breast, and it didn't matter if the breast were on a man or woman. He thought that made sense.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: shy477 on January 26, 2016, 09:04:22 AM
I've found most of my family to be understanding and supportive. My sisters have been giving me suggestions for bras, but my mother is still not fully understanding and suggested that I wrap my chest with an ace bandage. Friends and co-workers are generally cool about it, too, with only the occasional "that's weird" or what have you. Church is my next hurdle, as I don't expect they'll understand it fully.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: TigerPaws on January 26, 2016, 10:27:14 AM
Personally I take a very rigid stance on acceptance by others, as I do not have any living family that has not and is not an issue. Very few within my social/business circle are aware of my need to wear a bra and those who do understand and accept my choice not to undergo such an invasive procedure as a Double Mastectomy for purely cosmetic reasons.

If someone discovers or in the rare instance has a need to know, acceptance or at least quiet acquiescence is required or the social/business relationship is terminated.

As for the Ladies I date, it goes without saying that they all understand and accept if not embrace my having breasts or they would not be around.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: hammer on January 26, 2016, 12:48:55 PM
My family members are and have been totally supportive all along! My wife and daughter's encourage me to wear bras everyday long before my doctor did. I told my dad and the brother that I hunt with and both were very understanding too. I have never received a negative comment from anyone.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: Paa_Paw on January 26, 2016, 08:54:46 PM
This is sometimes actually funny.  My breast size is small compared to some of you guys and I sometimes don't even think about it.
Last summer, camping out and lolling by a lake I was in swim trunks with only  a loose shirt that was not buttoned.  My wife came over to me and gently buttoned my shirt while whispering: "Honey, you are showing too much Boob."  She has no problem with it but she is highly conscious of what others might think or say.  She is constantly looking out for me.  
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: Bman41 on January 27, 2016, 01:50:59 AM
I've never had a problem or a comment at all.  Maybe some notice, but if they do, not a comment at all.  My kids probably know, my drawer has more bras in it than my wife and they get in there to get stuff often enough.  
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: aboywithgirls on January 27, 2016, 02:01:38 PM
Our own acceptance of our breasts is most important. Then comes accepting having to wear a bra. It's definitely a choice. I have accepted having my breasts and wearing a bra. I wear a bra because I have large breasts. And so does my wife, my mother, my sister and just about every other woman I know. I just happen to be a man who has breasts  (as a matter of fact, both my sister and I wear a 36G in most of our bras) we're all wearing  for the same reason....We have breasts!
I really don't know why there has to be a stigma associated with it. 
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: TigerPaws on January 28, 2016, 06:44:09 PM
As I travel Internationally over 200 days a year and often in third world countries concealment is required especially as I am a 38D now. A compression sports bra, a suit and tie along with sports jackets work well. The people I associate with along with the Ladies I date all know and accept that I have fully developed female breasts. 
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: expedient-traveller on February 01, 2016, 04:32:22 PM
As I have been forced to wear more supportive "equipment" I have gotten some looks that I did not get when I squashed the "assets". Women give an almost understanding and accepting look. The few, very few looks I have gotten from men are quizzical almost unbelieving. Women are very supportive (pun intended).
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: hammer on February 01, 2016, 08:35:28 PM
Welcome to the club that most of us really don't want to be a part of, but have learned to live with!

In the end, it's really no big deal, even if you're an H cup like me! LOL
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: aboywithgirls on February 02, 2016, 07:22:35 AM
As I have been forced to wear more supportive "equipment" I have gotten some looks that I did not get when I squashed the "assets". Women give an almost understanding and accepting look. The few, very few looks I have gotten from men are quizzical almost unbelieving. Women are very supportive (pun intended).

I've had virtually the same experience. Women, for the most part , really do understand why we wear a bra. They also understand what it is like to spend hours trying on bras until you finally found a bra that truly fits just to look at the price tag and see that you will have to part with $100 + or - to bring it home. Most bras that I have purchased, I have been fitted for and very happy with my purchase. However, I'm still a guy, a guy with breasts but, still a guy. I think about some of the other things that I could have  bought with the money that I spent on my bras. In that respect, I think that women can relate, understand, and accept that we are wearing for the same reason. When they happen to notice, they know that we also have a unique understanding of what they go through as well.  
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: TigerPaws on February 02, 2016, 09:59:32 AM
As I have been forced to wear more supportive "equipment" I have gotten some looks that I did not get when I squashed the "assets". Women give an almost understanding and accepting look. The few, very few looks I have gotten from men are quizzical almost unbelieving. Women are very supportive (pun intended).

I've had virtually the same experience. Women, for the most part , really do understand why we wear a bra. They also understand what it is like to spend hours trying on bras until you finally found a bra that truly fits just to look at the price tag and see that you will have to part with $100 + or - to bring it home. Most bras that I have purchased, I have been fitted for and very happy with my purchase. However, I'm still a guy, a guy with breasts but, still a guy. I think about some of the other things that I could have  bought with the money that I spent on my bras. In that respect, I think that women can relate, understand, and accept that we are wearing for the same reason. When they happen to notice, they know that we also have a unique understanding of what they go through as well.  
Excellent observation gentlemen. Agreed most of the women I know both sympathize and understand what it is like to find, try on, purchase and wear a bra every day. The same goes for clothing, because of society we (men) must hide our breasts while women put them on display (except in the middle east). Our clothing options are more difficult and most of the time more limited.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: expedient-traveller on February 02, 2016, 11:55:21 AM
Boy do I identify with having to spend a lot of coin on a good fitting bra that could have been spent on something far more important and necessary for the betterment of the entire world. Something like a new fishing rod, some better lures, a nicer set of tires for the truck, or a new scope for one of the rifles.
Now we all put out a serious amount of coin on bras and then our bodies do not cooperate with the nice support systems we get for our "assets" by doing something like getting bigger and making us unable to use the new bras for more than a few months (3-8). As soon as we get used to one size, we grow some more and have to get used to the new size and get new bras, and then it happens again. It would be nice if there was a bra exchange where we could turn in our bras that we outgrow for some other ones that would fit.
Women understand and I have been aided by women who know a friend of mine and try to help me through her. They do not know me personally but feel for me and my situation. They are coming up with advice on bra types that might fit me or advising me on a bra I have on at the time, like it is too small or I need better support and I should not smash them. They have grown up having breasts and we men get them very suddenly. Their concern for guys with boobs is encouraging.
Guys do not ask or want to know about what is going on with my chest. They almost seem to be embaressed or fearful that what I have might be contageous (it seems). There is no concern or desire to help in any way shape or form...but then again, we are guys and guys do not grow boobs. LOL!
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: TigerPaws on February 02, 2016, 12:13:09 PM
"we are guys and guys do not grow boobs".

Well for all of the men on this forum that is not exactly true, as for your assessment of the time line for the life of a bra, 3 to 8 months falls in line with how long a woman's bra lasts depending on the quality. Considering that our breasts are no different than a woman's why should our's last longer?

And I agree; I spend a fair amount on bra's and bra tops, not that I really care how much I spend as I do not pay much attention to such things.

I do try a lot of different styles, types, sizes from different manufactures around the world, most are either not to my taste or do not fit me comfortably so I give them to a local thrift shop which sells them for a dollar to the less fortunate locals.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: expedient-traveller on February 02, 2016, 01:29:10 PM
I meant that in a "tongue in cheek" manner, with a LOL (laugh out loud) added in the end. As for giving our old bras to resale shops, I never thought of that. It is a good idea, thank you. Sage advice from a wise man. Thanks TigerPaws!
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: TigerPaws on February 02, 2016, 02:37:13 PM
I meant that in a "tongue in cheek" manner, with a LOL (laugh out loud) added in the end. As for giving our old bras to resale shops, I never thought of that. It is a good idea, thank you. Sage advice from a wise man. Thanks TigerPaws!
A joke may have been the intent but the point is still valid.
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: Paa_Paw on February 07, 2016, 05:15:23 PM
As with any support garment, a Bra needs time to relax and return to its original shape or it will be short lived.   A clerk told my Daughter who has very large Breasts, HH cups,  that she should not wear the same bra twice in a week if she wished it to last.  OK, the initial cost of that many garments was expensive, but the truth is that they now seem to last for ever. Simply allowing the garments a significant time to rest between uses has made a great difference.   If a garment is under heavy stress almost constantly it will soon start to sag.  
Title: Re: Acceptance by others
Post by: TigerPaws on February 07, 2016, 05:23:55 PM
As with any support garment, a Bra needs time to relax and return to its original shape or it will be short lived.   A clerk told my Daughter who has very large Breasts, HH cups,  that she should not wear the same bra twice in a week if she wished it to last.  OK, the initial cost of that many garments was expensive, but the truth is that they now seem to last for ever. Simply allowing the garments a significant time to rest between uses has made a great difference.   If a garment is under heavy stress almost constantly it will soon start to sag.  
Sage words sir, I wonder if that is why so many women .... Uh! Never mind.