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Guys !! Help me pls

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Guys !! Help me pls
« on: August 17, 2017, 02:22:00 PM »
I am terrified that what my future wife will think when she see my scars .... 
Eventhough its not much visible , if watched closely , it can be seen.. 
I am ashamed to say that i had boobs and removed surgically , 
She would most likely make a big issue about it ...  I am afraid that it might break our marriage . 
I cant even imagine ... 
Dont know what to do ... 
Wish i had the courage earlier to show my man boobs .... 
Why the hell i got myself this surgery ?? i was so adamant ... 
My life sucks .... 
Please dont get surgery .... Its a trap .... 
Live with the nature .... 
Dont suffer like me mentally everyday .... 
Always honesty is the best option .... 
Have no fear .... Live life ...
Dont lose your life with this ****ing internet marketing ... 
Atleast one person will love you for whatever you are ... 
Please dont the mistake i did ....
Surgery sucks ... My life is gone ...
each and everyday i am feeling guilty ..
Now i am worried more about my future ... 




Linkback: https://www.gynecomastia.org/smf/index.php?topic=32801.0

Re: Guys !! Help me pls
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2017, 04:06:05 PM »
I feel you to some point. I also have no idea how will I explain to my future GF or wife (if there will be one) that I (probably) had bigger boobs than her. Same goes for scars - they are white, but they are huge...
We differ at the point that I am glad I did it. Because I was |THIS| close to harming myself since I was so terribly disgusting to myself. 

*

hammer

Re: Guys !! Help me pls
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2017, 10:04:20 PM »
You need to stop finding so much fault and failure in your past action's and forgive yourself then move on!

Re: Guys !! Help me pls
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2017, 11:17:07 PM »
I recently read a book about one of my favorite college basketball coaches, John Wooden.  Wooden was known to everyone at UCLA to be a serious but kind and rather soft spoken man.  But Wooden wrestled with having at times a rather short fuse and a bad temper.  As a devoted Christian, Wooden struggled against his temper as being an unchristian characteristic.  Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, who wrote the book, spoke of a couple examples of Wooden’s dealing with his temper.  He gave an example where Coach was at a practice and something went wrong; shaking his head he said “Goodness Gracious!”   Abdul Jabbar commented, “Wow things were really getting serious here.”  I laughed when I read it because that statement was so strong as given by Wooden and so appropriate.

After reading the original post, I would like to think that if Coach Wooden had read that he would have said, “Goodness Gracious”.

Yes Hammer I agree, he needs to just move on.

Re: Guys !! Help me pls
« Reply #4 on: August 18, 2017, 11:46:19 PM »
I was exactly in your boat and hid it from my wife for years, even though I knew she probably knew, and she did.  I think if you mentioned it in a way that you don't consider it a big deal, she will be okay with it.  I had scars too and they were a concern when I took my shirt off, and that caused a lot of tension when we were first married.  But it was because she wanted my shirt off more than anything, and I wished I would have then.  She more or less forced it out of me, telling her what was the obvious, and she had no issue with it other than me not taking off my shirt.  Now the scars are faded and not noticeable.  I would much rather have had the scars instead of hiding my chest in heavy clothing etc.  There is over-the-counter medicine that makes the scars fade considerably.  I'm older than you, 63, so if you want to discuss more, I'd sure be available.  Having this condition seems to the person having it to be a cruel assault on masculinity, and believe me, the torment I went through was terrible.  I wasn't teased or harassed in school but I knew everyone in the locker room could tell and it was humiliating.  So, please let me know if you want to discuss with me more.  I'll give my email address but don't use it much and have another that I use more often.  I'll keep an eye on it to see if you reply, then I'll give another that I check all the time.  You can email me at maxlogan333@gmail.com.  I hope I can help you.

Re: Guys !! Help me pls
« Reply #5 on: August 19, 2017, 03:18:45 PM »
God it's amazing how people always find something to be depressed about.
You had man boobs, it was impacting your life, you had surgery to improve your life quality. That's the story, which also happens to be the truth - that you should tell to your wife. What is embarrassing about that? 
I am only 26 and I don't have scars after surgery but with the thought of telling future partners I am pretty sure I'm just going to own it "I had a boobjob and it was the best decision I ever made". Because honestly, I am delighted with the results and my life quality has shot up! I am comfortable with body now. 
Whatever you do, just own it. Even if she was unsure what to make of it, when you are a boss about it she will accept it and probably even find it funny or cool. Don't be all negative about it, insecurity is the biggest turn off. 
It sounds like you still have psychological issues, but that is not the case for the rest of us who have had surgery and now live vastly better lives as a result. So don't try to put others off. 



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