Author Topic: newbie - my story  (Read 1270 times)

Offline chaos_agent

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newbie here...
(not surgery related)

My name is Greg.
i’m 59yrs old. For the most part I’ve coexisted with my man boobs.
I’ve had this “problem” since Jr high.  i was overweight at that time.
I went out for football. The coach asked me when my baby was due and made a point to take extra time explaining what a girls menstruation is looking directly at me in health class. There were other chunky boys on the team and he didn’t shame them. I knew it was my breast that had made me his target for harassment. After that, I guess I could say that I was able to deal with the teasing and do alot of stuff “normal” guys do.

I was able to date, and do other stuff. I could even tolerate the abuse from participating in shirts/skins or swimming. But the abuse was there. I remember mostly, comments from other boys.  The most common hurtful comments was their admiration of my chest, saying stuff like “wow you have a nice perky rack”, “your nipples are hard, are you happy to see me?”. Gesturing with there hands that they wanted to fondle.

I adopted the slumping posture, avoided the clingy shirts. Put a shirt on as quickly as possible when in a locker room or changing around others. I even lost 55lbs ~20yrs ago.  I was 210lbs, and now weight ~158lbs. At 5’11”, I am a slim guy. I have kept active. The weight loss didn’t reduce my chest, but I felt good about my fitness. Until I see a picture of myself. Perfectly good pictures are ruined by my breast.  Half of my closet is off limits because of the way they fit and the probability my boobs would be detected.

I am a guy, male, heterosexual. I like guy stuff, cars, guns, sports. Women and all that comes with them. I have a black belt in taekwondo. I program computers. But I look at my breast, and it seems easier to fanticize what it would be like if the lower part below my waist was also female. Still I am  comfortable identifying as a man.

Over the last few years I have become more aware of my breast. I’m sure my age is a factor. I have adult ADHD. I am a little suspicious of my medications. My boobs are getting bigger, but the big thing I’ve noticed is they has loosened to make my breast look more like a females breast. Especially if I bend over and then look at my breast. They are there sagging straight down. I’m to the point where it may be time to look at some bras. They are more sensitive and wiggle/bounce when I’m active. I’m not in agony, but I am convinced they would feel better if supported by a bra.

I finally sat my wife down a few days ago and told her everything for the first time. The jr high coach, the perky breasts comments. I didn’t tell her I admired a couple of her bras but I did tell her a bra is an option.  She is supportive but I am still not comfortable go full out to find and wear a bra. I bought a moobs compression vest from amazon. I hate it and immediately returned it. I have one nike “fitted” dry fit shirt that is tight enough to provide some smoothing of my boobs.  I frequently wear it when I need to wear one of those shirts on the dark side of my closet. But I also hate it but it’s all I have. That leaves bras. I measured my band and bust and fall somewhere between 36C and 38B.

Martial arts are my passion. I wear a gi which completely hides my boobs. I can forget them and just about everything else that is occupying my brain and have fun hitting things.  I do struggle with anxiety and depression. Martial arts has been good for me in so many ways, I don’t know where I would be without it.

As I mentioned I have a black belt in TKD and will soon test for second degree. I am also learning karate and want to get a black belt in karate if my body cooperates.  So if anyone wants to tell me to my face that I’m a girly man because of my breasts, I say - go for it.

Stay strong my brothers.


Linkback: https://www.gynecomastia.org/forum/index.php?topic=33989.0

hammer

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Hi Greg, Bob here AKA Hammer 60 years of age and an old timer here on the forum and also like you I had gyno back in high school,  but I was a tough guy so no one messed with me! I was the farm boy in the city! I spent my summers on the farm with my aunt and uncle, and when I got older I worked construction with my other uncles, so I was very strong and no on would mess with me! So I'm very sorry about the crap that you had to deal with from the coach and others!

Even in the service I never had any kind of problems like that because of who I was. So I really I'm sorry that people can be so mean! I actually was a guy who would not put up with bullying! I did not agree with any kind of harrassment at all and would not allow it if I was around!

It sounds like you have a supportive wife, and that is half the battle of acceptance. The rest is up to you! We are all here for one another on the forum to help each other and if you decide to use a bra for support we think of a bra this way, a bra is an article of clothing made to support breast and it doesn't matter if the breast are on a man or woman!

So Greg if I haven't done it yet I would like to welcome you to the forum and if I can help you in any way please let me know!

Bob

Offline Johndoe1

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---LONG POST--

Hi Greg. I too have suffered with a bust since high school and all the "fun" that goes along with it being your typical Type A male. A few years ago I had to come to terms with my chest as I lost a lot of weight from having been overweight due to eating to try to hide my chest, but very little in the chest came off and my true shape has become more feminine in appearance due to my bust. I understand the thoughts of "what if". I think that is a normal response. You are trying to comprehend and understand why you are in this "situation" and nothing really computes so to speak.  Please try to remember this is not a physical problem but a societal issue. You or your chest IS NOT THE PROBLEM. It is how society views breast in general.


A blood panel from my doctor confirmed what I had suspected for years, that my estrogen was at a level not common for males and my testosterone was at a uncommon low level for a male. That does not make me "defective " in any way, shape or form. Other than my hormones not being in some arbitrary range, I am perfectly normal. And so are all of us.

Know you are not alone and wearing a bra is not the end of the world. In fact, it could be the beginning of a better life. In my case it has been. Since I started wearing a bra, my chest doesn't move around now and the wandering eyes have definitely decreased, something that totally surprised me. As I have learned, if you have breasts, people already know it. You can hide it all you want, but if you are not flat chested, people can tell. If you are wearing a bra to support the tissue, they have a very difficult time discerning that, unless they touch you like in a hug or you wear very tight shirts that show the outline of a bra. Even women who have been wearing a bra their whole lives have a very hard time being certain who is wearing a bra and who isn't. That has been my experience. A properly fitting bra helps to keep telltale signs down as well as the bra molds to the body. A layering tank also helps to hide the lumps and bumps of adjusters and such and keep them under control as well. It also helps in this PC world we live in, no one will usually say anything in fear of you calling them out. It can be kind of messed up in a lot of ways, but use all the advantages you can! That is what most of us do. And remember we are here for you.
« Last Edit: November 15, 2018, 12:32:16 PM by Johndoe1 »

hammer

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I also like what ABWG's said about "why are you wearing a bra"? Once!

Why are you wearing shoes? You have feet, right! "Well, bras are for breast, I have breast that need support"!

Offline blad

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For me, giving into the high school taunts that I needed a bra and actually trying one, was a turning point in my acceptance of my breasts. It felt more comfortable and appropriate to be wearing one. I think the shaping of a bra it improves my outward profile and reduces attention from bouncing breasts.
If the bra fits, wear it.

Offline SideSet

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My experience was like Blad’s.   After so many times of hearing that I needed to wear a bra, I finally decided to try one on. 

I guess I shouldn’t have been, but I was surprised to see that my breasts filled the bra cups. The bra actually looked good on me.  And it felt good to have everything nicely held in place,  no more of that jiggling. 

When I put on a top, I discovered that the bra also stopped me from nipping out. 

I felt and looked better in a bra. I knew the comments were not said to be helpful, but they were correct. I needed to wear a bra.  




Offline marcoss

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Awesome story. Im so sorry.


 

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