Gynecomastia Support Forum

General => Your Stories => Topic started by: Jerry_Bell on June 27, 2005, 05:01:48 PM

Title: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: Jerry_Bell on June 27, 2005, 05:01:48 PM
Hello, I am a male, 63 years of age, happily married and trying to learn to live with wearing a bra.  I have gyneomastia due to a medical condition which has caused me to not produce any testosterone.  I am on testosterone replacement therapy since about Feb. of this year. I have a very understanding wife, who is helpful to me in me wearing a bra.  
My doctor, a female, told me that a bra would most likely help my nipple pain and the pain in the breast itself.  She sent me to a fitting shop and I have been wearing one since.  I do not have hardly any pain now, but when I take the bra off at night, the pain comes back. So I usually wear one at night.
Are there any out there who have decided to not have surgery (due to many reasons) and have elected to wearing a bra?  I would like to hear from you and your experiences.  This could help me, since I am very timid about going in public with a bra.  The bra does make me protrude more, but it is worth it for the pain relief that I get from wearing the bra. Let me hear from you if you would like to discuss this more.  Have a great day..

jdb
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: Gine2D on July 02, 2005, 03:22:07 AM
I don't wear one but have seen guys that do.  Mine aren't painful but do bounce around.  They are 40-C & just starting to sag a bit.

Have you tried the quality sports bras?  They give support but do not protrude like a regular bra, so they are less noticeable under a dark shirt.

My wife wears them with her "Ds" when she does physical activities.  Hers cost about $30.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: Badgene on July 02, 2005, 08:51:15 AM
I get a lot of pain in my shoulders and my lower back. I really have a feeling its from the gyne. Would that be possible? There are days I think wouldn’t mind having a bra to wear but I just cant do that. I really think its one thing for a 63 year old guy with a wife to do so, but not a seeking 19 year old. I can’t imagine the reaction I would face if my friends or co-workers noticed me wearing a bra. Back in school though, that would have been literally impossible to pull off with any amount of dignity.

BTW I get a LOT of pain. You don’t think that if I can prove my gyne is the cause of a lot of long-term terrible shoulder and back problems I could get health insurance to help me out? Because I swear, I feel like a 60 year old man. Too bad I'm not. Then I could retire and no longer face work’s humiliation. Maybe I should just show up with a bra and let them have it out with me, then sue later for sexual harassment. If I cant go up to those B****s and pinch their nipples then they cant do it to me!
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: a-man on July 20, 2005, 08:42:24 AM
badgene: you should try a compression vest from underworks..... like you said, a bra might be good for an old man... but not someone your age...

the vest will give you support and help your posture
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: ItsOK on July 22, 2005, 04:32:53 PM
I have been wearing a bra for several months and find that it eliminates pain related to my breasts flopping.  A side effect is that the reduction in jiggling makes them less noticable.  I stay away from thin white t-shirts where the straps are obvious, and I really don't think that people notice the bra.  They may notice the breasts, but they would anyway.

I have had good luck buying bras in local big-box stores.  I suppose that in theory I should have gone to someplace like a department store and gotten carefully measured, but I had no desire to go through that embarassment and I'm not eager to pay department store prices for frilly sexy bras.  I find that the discount stores have a reasonable selection of generic "everyday" bras, which is exactly what I am looking for.  No lace, no frills.  Some of them you would even think that they designed them for a man.

Once I find a style that works, I try to buy several identical bras because I have discovered that you can't count on women's clothing inventory staying the same, at least not at the discount stores.  On the other hand, I find that I need to wear it for a day or so to be sure; sometimes what feels great initially can be uncomfortable after a couple of hours.

I can't say that I've tried the fancy mail-order compression vests, but frankly my desire is to be comfortable, not to disguise the fact that I have breasts while making myself miserable.  For me, a bra has turned out to be a good solution.  Your milage may vary.

But don't endure breast pain just because you are somehow hung up with the "men don't wear bras" idea.  If the bra fits, wear it.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: a-man on July 24, 2005, 12:28:19 PM
define: Bra:

"an undergarment worn by women to support their breasts"

best bra for men IMO, is none

find another way to hide/support them... compression vests, underarmour, etc etc
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: ItsOK on July 24, 2005, 02:28:48 PM
a-man, I don't know where you got your definition, but it's pretty silly.

There's this widely-available piece of clothing which is manufactured to support human breasts.  Because there are so many people who wear it, there are a large number of styles available and prices are low.  The fact that very few men have large enough breasts to justify wearing a bra does not mean that the device works any worse on a male than on a female.

Fell free to spend ten times more money buying your breast support.  If it is worth it for you to read "chest compression garmet" on the box instead of "bra", then who am I to tell you how to spend your money?  Personally, I'll take advantage of the mass market since the products there meet my needs perfectly, are easy to acquire, and are cheaper.

As for what is the ideal bra for a man, maybe I will try to take a picture and post it here.  There are a number of designs which have no lace or decoration.  I prefer the models with some lycra as I find them to provide the level of support that I need.  A side effect is that the plain models are often the cheapest.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: a-man on July 24, 2005, 02:56:30 PM
i just did a google search for a definition.... every definition included the word "woman"
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: ItsOK on July 24, 2005, 03:58:39 PM
Quote
i just did a google search for a definition.... every definition included the word "woman"


So?

Is the ghost of Noah Webster going to attack me if I flaunt the official defintion of a term?  I suppose I could waste my time looking for an "official" definition that doesn't include the word "woman", but I don't really care.

I have a number of women friends who buy some of their clothes in the men's department because they have observed that they get better quality for less money.  Noah Webster would be upset.

I have explained that I have no problem with using something in a way that is different than the way most people use it, if it's to my advantage.  You remind me of women who buy "women's razors" which are exactly the same as razors packaged for use by men, but cost ten times as much.

If it makes people more comfortable to wear "chest compressors" because the box says "for men", fine.  But please don't bore me with a list of "definitions" of the word "bra" as a justification for my taking advantage of an inexpensive and effective solution to my problem.

As I consider this issue, it's really rather humorous.  Presumably some men would be aghast at wearing the piece of clothing in question if it came in a box which used the word "bra", but they would be perfectly comfortable wearing exactly the same item if it came in a box marked "chest compression vest".

On the other hand, if that's what it takes to remove the stigma of wearing a piece of clothing to support your breasts, and results in greater comfort, then it's well worth the extra cost.  I am sure that the women who buy the specially-packaged razors are convinced that they work much better than the models manufactured for men.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: billie9995 on August 03, 2005, 06:49:41 AM
I have had gyno my whole life but it was not severe until I started medication for my prostate at age 55.  By the age of 60 I had obvious C cup problems.  I consulted with two plastic surgeons who both described the "anchor scar" and the fact that I was not going to get away with simple liposuction.  My wife and I both decided against it.  

There was a problem that with increased size I was experiencing painful broken blood vessles under my arms called hematomas which turned to bruises and left stretch marks.  It got so bad I would grab my breasts when we hit bumps in the road and forget the riding lawn mower or boat bouncing.

First I tried wide ace bandages but they just rolled up finding a place to pinch above or below my breasts.  Next I tried the Gyno Vests made for this problem.  They were hot, uncomfortable and very expensive (I spent several hundred dollars to find one I could tolerate).  I was unsuccessful!  

Finally I tried a bra!  It was cheap, comfortable, came in beige seamless minimizer to prevent show through.  With a dark shirt it actually hides my problem to some degree.  I only need to wear it for long trips in the car, cutting the grass and riding my boat or ATV.  No more bruises, hematomas or raw nipples.  I almost do not mind my problem anymore.

Finally they are part of me and very sensitive to the point I would not want them cut up.  I actually enjoy them at quiet times and could not imagine two large scars and nipples without sensation.

Meeting others with the same problem has helped me get over the embarrassment to the point that I checked them out as they did me but I am still not wearing white T shirts and white or black bras that show through.  

A bra is just a means of living comfortably without surgery.  The best solution to a problem.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: a-man on August 06, 2005, 10:28:39 AM
Indeed.

Lately I have also discovered the benefit of purses. I mean, why carry around a tiny wallet... just to satisfy society's opinion of what a "man" should be?

A purse holds more, doesn't create a bulge in my pocket, and is also stylish.

And while I'm at it, I have also discovered the benefit of women's underwear. Why be stuck with boring men's boxers of briefs when there is a world of frilly, silk & satin, comfortable, and colourful women's underwear out there.

So yes, to all of you who are wearing women's bras, why stop there? I also encourage you to try out purses and women's underwear while you are at it.

Next step... dresses.

;D
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: ItsOK on August 06, 2005, 04:01:36 PM
Thank you, a-man, for clarifying for us what it means to be a Real Man.

No Real Man would ever consider using anything that was made for a woman.  It might somehow pollute his masculinity.

A Real Man would never wear a piece of clothing that made him more comfortable and made it less obvious that he has large breasts.  A Real Man can't have breasts.  He must either hide them at all costs or have them surgically removed.

A Real Man must always take the stereotypical macho way.  He must be Buff, he must be Muscled, he must be Masculine as the current society defines Masculine.

It's really too bad that a Real Man doesn't have enough self confidence to step outside the narrow bounds that he thinks that society has defined for him.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: a-man on August 06, 2005, 08:45:54 PM
Why the cynicism? Clearly I am agreeing with you guys..

Just because I am willing to go a step further doesn't mean I am against you.

Quote
It's really too bad that a Real Man doesn't have enough self confidence to step outside the narrow bounds that he thinks that society has defined for him.


Oh but I do. That's why I suggest carrying around a purse... why be stuck with a tiny little wallet when a purse can do so much more? I have realized the wisdom in your guys' words...

And while we're at it... why have all these women walking around in tight skirts and high-heeled shoes? Just because society says it looks good? I mean who wants to see girls dressed up in such revealing and attractive ways... obviously those things cant be too comfortable... they should all just wear loose baggy clothing like the rest of us. Then we can all be a bunch of happy old fogeys  ;D

My point? For some people (ie old men and women), fine, just do whats comfortable, no one will notice either way. Go ahead and wear bras.

For us with some sex drive left, who want to remain at least somewhat within societal norms, we'll find other solutions.

My only problem with these posts (ie "I have breasts and I accept them") is the air of superiority given off. Don't think that you guys have reached some higher state of psycological being than us... IMO, if you can walk around wearing a bra, then you have reached a point in your life where you simply don't care how you look, and neither does anyone else.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: gyno_boy on August 08, 2005, 04:43:30 AM
I think relief would be a better word than Hero!

Most men wouldnt wear a bra, not young men anyway, its far too humiliating.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: a-man on August 08, 2005, 08:49:06 AM
Quote
How about the 'I had breasts but got them hacked off, so I'm a hero and deserve a medal' syndrome that pervades these threads.


Hero? I have been following this board for a long time and have never come across that attitude. Like the poster above me said, people are more relieved that they can get on living their lives like normal males. I don't feel like a hero... I just feel normal now.

Anyway after re-reading this thread.... I can't believe I spent this much time arguing with a bunch of grown men who walk around wearing bras.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: Gine2D on August 08, 2005, 06:08:22 PM
I wish I was perfect & always right in what I say.  It must really be a good feeling.

I think that some of us "non-perfect" guys with breasts still have a good sex drive remaining, I do.

G
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: hondacrx on August 10, 2005, 06:15:42 AM
a-man - you are an insensitive, arrogant fool.

Consider that some may not have the financial resources to afford surgery.  Wearing a bra is a cost-effective, last-resort solution to an overall crappy situation.  Get over the fact that others here are able to make a decision in bravery, which your cowardess prohibits you from making.  

That said, to those of you living with the condition as I am, I have found it acceptable to simply dress in baggier clothing or in layers.  I find a black tshirt tucked in, with a non-buttoned-up dress shirt over that works well, and looks good too.  Though I have not tried myself, if done right, you could probably hide a bra under that - no problem.

As we are all keenly aware, society does not accept us very readily.  I'm sure we all have felt the same shame, embarrasment, and dispair about our condition.  Society is changing however.  I'm sure even 20 years ago, it would have been complete taboo for a man to buy himself a bra in a department store.  But now we have examples to the contrary.  As people are educated about G, more will be understanding of what we feel compelled to do about it.

On a side note, as I was composing this, I thought about the how some women who are too small to need a bra often times feel forced to wear one.  It's simply crazy that men who need a bra, can't wear one, while women who don't need one, must.  And it all depends on the organs between our legs?  Society is just silly that way I guess.

Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: a-man on August 10, 2005, 08:38:28 AM
Quote
Get over the fact that others here are able to make a decision in bravery, which your cowardess prohibits you from making.


::)

See what I mean. What makes all your bra-wearing men so great vs us who have opted to actually DO something about our condition?

It takes plenty of bravery to admit you have a condition. It takes bravery to make the decision to do something about it (instead of just "living with it"). It takes bravery to make that first trip to the doctor... etc etc...

Whereas any little girl can walk into the bra section of a department store.

This thread reminds me of all the fatasses of the world who claim society is so intolerant and insensitive to fat people and their needs... when in reality they just need to get off their fat asses and DO something about their condition, instead of deciding to just "live with it" and blame society for not accepting them.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: ItsOK on August 11, 2005, 04:57:17 AM
Quote
Anyway after re-reading this thread.... I can't believe I spent this much time arguing with a bunch of grown men who walk around wearing bras.

So, a-man, why are you still here?  You expressed your opinion long ago.  Insults and name calling don't really add that much to the discussion.

Different strokes for different folks.  Why can't we all accept this?  For some people, surgery is the right answer.  For others, it's not.  Is that really so hard to understand?
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: hondacrx on August 11, 2005, 05:00:47 AM
a-man

You are forgetting some things:

1)  Not everyone can afford surgery.
2)  Surgery doesn't always work.  They can come back.
3)  Not everyone is obese or even fat here.
4)  Although relatively safe, any surgery does have risks.
5)  Excercise won't fix the problem if it is caused by hormones.

What makes you so great vs us who must find other ways to deal with our condition?
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: bathroom on August 15, 2005, 02:31:42 PM
I think the issue is one of self-respect.  NO self-respecting man would wear a bra and be happy with that.  It's disgusting.

I think most men would rather blow their brains out.  At least they'd die with some dignity.

It's hard to believe this thread is real.  Just a bunch of cross-dressers looking for an excuse to cross dress.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: Pferdestärken on August 16, 2005, 08:04:53 AM
The bottom line surely is that we all care what we look like, and our position in society is to an extent determined by what we look like. First impressions count, and for most people that first impression is visual. If you are genuinely past caring what others think of you then fine, more power to you.  In a society obsessed with personal appearance you are in a small and very privileged minority. The original poster is not one of you however, as witnessed by his timidity at going public.

While I may agree that men should be free to wear some form of support garment if required, actually doing so will be considered strange by the vast majority of the population - it is just not the norm, however sensible. (But then neither is having breasts.)

Someone posted that they
Quote
actually enjoy them at quiet times and could not imagine two large scars and nipples without sensation.
The first part of this is frankly more information than decency requires, nothing more to be said.

The second part reveals a degree of ignorance - as do comments about hacking off body parts and self mutilation by proxy.

I do not feel multilated in any way, I have two very small and unnoticeable scars, and my nipples have full sensation. What I don't have, now, is two huge pendulous breast which require external support.

Jerry, you should seek out a bra which attempts to flatten rather than accentuate the breast, as most womens bras would naturally ten to. Sports bras may be the answer, and skin coloured would help in keeping the bra hidden. Good luck.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: bathroom on August 20, 2005, 07:16:41 AM
If you develop breasts late in life (far after puberty) you should go to a doctor.  You could have a tumor in the testes or adrenal glands.  

But I suppose you wouldn't want to treat that if you did.  Better to wear a bra.  
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: girlieman on September 25, 2005, 08:04:51 PM
Quote
If you develop breasts late in life (far after puberty) you should go to a doctor.  You could have a tumor in the testes or adrenal glands.  


And winged monkeys could fly out my äss, too, I suppose.  The former is slightly more probable than the latter.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: boobstay on November 19, 2005, 06:54:32 AM
I'm boobstay, I think you mad a good choice. I'm in a simular sit. my health want let me do anything about it.
Med. probs. have made me impatant anyway. After awhile the bra will be secont nature to ya.
I don't give a danm what people thing either. Humans are to quik to judge!!!! Haven't meet a perfect one yet!!!!!!!!! Just be yourself to hell with opinions!!!!!
Boobstay    
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: Paa_Paw on November 24, 2005, 05:05:54 PM
This issue can be condensed to a great degree.

Not everyone is a good candidate for surgery.  The reasons are many, with finances and other medical conditions being only two good examples.  

Most men could not fill a bra so for them this is not an issue.  Others have need of one for physical comfort.  If there is a need, get one that provides the needed support. There is nothing sissy about meeting a legitimate need.

In my own case, I do not need one on a daily basis but ocasionally wear an athletic bra when engaged in active work or recreation to control the jiggle and bounce. If that offends anyone, it is their problem rather than mine.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: SeanT on August 13, 2020, 05:20:59 PM
Indeed.

Lately I have also discovered the benefit of purses. I mean, why carry around a tiny wallet... just to satisfy society's opinion of what a "man" should be?

A purse holds more, doesn't create a bulge in my pocket, and is also stylish.

And while I'm at it, I have also discovered the benefit of women's underwear. Why be stuck with boring men's boxers of briefs when there is a world of frilly, silk & satin, comfortable, and colourful women's underwear out there.

So yes, to all of you who are wearing women's bras, why stop there? I also encourage you to try out purses and women's underwear while you are at it.

Next step... dresses.

 ;D
Well, where I come from you don't have too look far to find a man with a "purse" strapped around his waste. Oh... and he'll also be wearing a plaid "skirt" and carrying a small knife in his "stocking". It's called Scotland and you may do well not to comment on his masculinity, call his kilt a skirt or his sporran a purse. 
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: MarcoB on August 27, 2020, 02:08:17 AM
I get a lot of pain in my shoulders and my lower back. I really have a feeling its from the gyne. Would that be possible? There are days I think wouldn’t mind having a bra to wear but I just cant do that. I really think its one thing for a 63 year old guy with a wife to do so, but not a seeking 19 year old. I can’t imagine the reaction I would face if my friends or co-workers noticed me wearing a bra. Back in school though, that would have been literally impossible to pull off with any amount of dignity.

BTW I get a LOT of pain. You don’t think that if I can prove my gyne is the cause of a lot of long-term terrible shoulder and back problems I could get health insurance to help me out? Because I swear, I feel like a 60 year old man. Too bad I'm not. Then I could retire and no longer face work’s humiliation. Maybe I should just show up with a bra and let them have it out with me, then sue later for sexual harassment. If I cant go up to those B****s and pinch their nipples then they cant do it to me!
How big are your breasts?  If they're causing back and shoulder pain, I'm sure you can't hide them anyway, meaning you might attract less attention to them if you add a bra to shape and hold them in place anyway.  Otherwise, if they're still small enough to hide but need something to remedy the soreness and irritation of going braless, there are various bras that hide well under certain kinds of shirts.  Tank-style pull-over bras are the easiest to hide, but may not be the most comfortable.  I find them a lot better than nothing though.  If anyone sees an outline at all (which is unlikely), they might just think it's a tank-type undershirt.  The bra I like most right now has that giveaway shape in the back, so I don't wear it when others will see me; but the Hanes MHH559 (https://www.hanes.com/hanes-cotton-stretch-comfort-flex-fit-wirefree-bra-2-pack.html)'s shape in the back hides much better, and I've been wearing that one a lot recently.  Whatever you wear, you can hide it better under a shirt with dark, inch-wide stripes like in my attached picture where I'm wearing the Hanes HU11 (https://www.hanes.com/hanes-ultimate-comfy-support-comfortflex-fit-wirefree-bra.html) with no undershirt and you'd be pretty hard-pressed to see the outline in the photo (and you'd also have to look pretty hard to see it in person in many lighting conditions).  Its shoulder strap adjusters are in the front; but it does have the hook-and-eye closure in the back.  You can also hide a bra well under a shirt with a dark plaid; and starching the shirt also helps.  I think you could wear something suitable to work to remedy the problem without anyone ever knowing, if you do it right.


Quote
On a side note, as I was composing this, I thought about the how some women who are too small to need a bra often times feel forced to wear one.
I remember a girl in high school who fit that description.  The rules required that all girls wear bras, pantyhose, and dresses.  (This was in the 70's.)  I don't remember the rules for boys, probably because I met them without any effort or inconvenience anyway.  I think we boys had it easier.
Title: Re: Wearing a Bra......
Post by: blad on October 11, 2020, 11:47:37 PM
I developed my breasts around the age of 13, long before the internet age to help make sense of the situation. 

I was often told back then by many fellow classmates that I needed a bra. Although their comments were not meant to be helpful, it did lead me to try bras in my early teens. I discovered that I did in fact fit a bra well and began to also notice that I felt more comfortable wearing one. I transitioned to wearing a bra full time and am quite satisfied how it controls my breast movement and in general provides comfort that is missing when braless. I also feel it makes my profile look a bit smoother in public.

If I could make my breast tissue suddenly disappear without surgery I would get in line. But really, it has become no big deal to wear a bra full time and I don't even think about it being on most of the time. Once one gets beyond any hang ups that it is a bra, it just works and feels fine and solves an issue with minimal intervention. Who needs the risk of unnecessary surgery. There are a lot of examples of cosmetic surgery that have had questionable results. 
SMFPacks CMS 1.0.3 © 2020