Author Topic: With trepidation, I suggest it really can be simple to have accord  (Read 1005 times)

Offline Dudewithboobs

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I don't see where the threads and sections are controlled by crossdressers. I don't see crossdressers really at all. I do see topics here and there that have been controlled by people who seem to be fascinated or enamored with fantasy of feminization and utilize the thread and forum to use as a genuine user and man with breasts to try and lure and fish for anyone biting to be a part of and a few have and those threads generally get dismissed quickly and left alone quicker as people here catch on to what the person is doing. 

There are users here who wear blouses and panties cause they have medical conditions that have caused their bodies to change shape, not by their own doing or willful partiipation to have it as a result, but because as Forest Gump said "s--t happens" and unfortunately, fat redistributes, breasts get too large for a mans shirt, and redistribution of fat causes mens pants and underwear to feel weird. So panties and stretch jeans become a better option as do blouses vs button ups given the space a woman's shirt provides up top whereas a man's does not. Men's jeans for the most part are now largely made of stretch material so theres really no difference in the fashions now. Sure, this is dictated strongly by the man choosing to wear and their comfort to do so vs sucking it up and dealing with it and being uncomfortable cause they aren't no sissy and won't be caught dead in panties and a womans top. But the men here aren't wearing women's sweaters and blouses that are feminine. Those posting links to help others are posting to tops and such that are quite unisex to help show others they can be comfortable if they need the option to be in other clothing without fear of it being feminine and seen as such. I don't think it is about crossdressing at all and think it is strongly about comfort and convenience. Some men swallow their pride and machoness and go I'll give it a shot, and do so, and find it to be more comforrtable and stick with it, others can't get past the idea its a womans article of clothing and would rather be uncomfortable and learn to deal with it. Matter of preference.

I also don't see it as crossdressing if a man has breasts. If a man has A cups or small B cups, i'm confident they do not need a bra, they do not warrant the justification for a bra. And that is based on my own ignornace and stance. There are women who have A Cups and complain about not having one one and I'd assume it goes the same for men. It's a matter of comfort and convenience. There are men here who have C, D, H cups and to be honest, there aren't many pictures of men here who post frequently showing off their size and shape so who knows who here actually has the breasts to demand bras and tops and such and who doesn't. But I don't question them, cause of the integrity of this forum. I have been on this forum twice under one name, left for a bit and came back. Those on this forum have held true to character and their integrity to help others find a safe space to accept their breasts and options for accepting them if they choose to find comfort in them instead of insecurity. It is because of those people here I can be proud of my breasts, that when I feel my breasts grow I can feel happy about it, that if a day comes where my chest is too much and I need a bra, or need to find a blouse cause my button ups are no longer wanting to button up, that I can be confident I may be the only guy in my city with this issue, but not the only guy in general and can come here to find solace and comfort in those who can help me grow more comfortable in the skin I'm in and options to be comfortable instead of feeling like a freak or alone and sad. I don't think this forum and site is dictated by crossdressers at all. These men are not living a life of femininity or walking around in heels and lipstick organizing purses and gossiping. We are men who have breasts, who have bodies shaped differently cause of the effects of what promoted the breasts to grow, and so forth who are trying to help others deal with their bodies, and trying to help erase the stigma that a man in a bra is not a pervert or crossdresser, a man in a bra is just dealing with the same thing a woman does and seeking the same understanding without being questioned. 

I have a wife of 4 years and a kid and it scares the crap out of me that if my chest keeps growing like it has that I will be unattractive to her, that I will be uncomfortable cause of the jiggling i'm now having and the embarrassment that my kid my experience when she is old enough to realize dad has breasts or worse her one day friends asks or mocks me cause of it. But it's the great guys here who help me realize I'm not alone, ii'm not a freak and i'm definitely not a crossdresser just cause I have bras and wish I could wear them daily for comfort. I think you need to figure out the definition of comfort and crossdressing. Again we are not prancing around in heels, we are just happy to have the option and humility to be comfortable in our own skin and allow our pride to be set aside and put a bra on to relieve the pains and strains of what we have on our chests 

Offline 42CSuprise!

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I'm aware that many of the men who post here are married or in a committed relationship.  It is quite natural that a big part of their concern with breasts appearing slowly, or quickly on their chest, is how their partner will respond to what is happening.  Will we be seen as manly, attractive with breasts?

I'm not in a relationship so those questions aren't in front of me.  I live alone and have for many years.  My closest relationship is with my former wife and ours is more an enduring friendship than anything else.  I've alluded to the fact my body is changing and that I have more prominent breasts but I haven't yet arrived at her home wearing a brassiere as I am at the moment.  Since I'm not experiencing any negative physical symptoms from my growing breasts, I don't NEED to wear a brassiere.  What I'm exploring is rather my wanting to wear a brassiere... going into the experience of feeling the brassiere on my body and seeing my breasts in a tee shirt.  We are talking about having breasts of our own here.  On one level, the one most often talked about here, we're dealing with the kinds of things men always talk about... how to fix something... find a brassiere or not... what kind of brassiere to buy... whether we need different clothes to make it work.  All of this is a way of moving toward acceptance rather than toward cutting off a part of our bodies because we can't tolerate what seems a threat to our masculinity.  As a man who has dealt with gynecomastia since I was a teen, I've had plenty of struggles with that one but going under the knife does not seem a reasonable solution.

So if I don't need to negotiate with a partner and am content with shopping for and then wearing a brassiere, what is the experience of having breasts and wearing a brassiere like?  I've read on other threads that men like their breasts and enjoy wearing a brassiere and sometimes breasts are sensitive to the touch and that can become a sexual thing.  I find myself rather transfixed by my breasts, the way they feel in the soft cups of the brassiere.  I look at them in the mirror and find myself touching them through my tee shirt.  I've taken screen shots with my computer.  I'm not fantasizing about being a woman and have no desire to crossdress.  But there is an erotic component to all of this sense of being both a man and a woman.  The breasts I see and feel lead me to these meandering thoughts.  I thought I'd share them not to convince anyone of anything but simply to say this is how simple acceptance is working through this body/mind.  Frankly, I'm fascinated with it all.


 

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