Author Topic: Getting to the point of needing a bra daily  (Read 3491 times)

steven618

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I am a 30 y/o male fairly well in shape, enjoy my pizza here and there but mainly am in great shape. My breasts began to grow about 3-4 years ago and stopped at a point where i was paranoid but they were still small enough to be taken as pecs unless i bent over or laid on my side. In the last year they have gone from a small a cup to a bordering B cup and feel a bra is necessary at this point. I feel the soreness after a full day of even just hanging out at the house from them hanging there and if im running which im avid at doing and work the bounce and movement leaves me sore and noticing the mobility of them in motion. My wife would hate for me to wear one so I don't and haven't for quite some time. Even though at a time of my worries when they began growing again she didn't seem to mind long as I mentioned it first so she wasn't off guard. Since then I have thrown my bras out just to re order some when growth took off again to preapre for the worst, and the worst seems to have occurded. My breasts now have creases in them and curves and for being a bordering B cup are very full feeling with tissue. My wife is one who, once you make your mind up stick with it, especially with something like a feminine item of clothing. I am scared if i bring it up she will get turned off, angry and upset. She is the most loving person I know but being traditional christian I know she sees it as wrong and being a very feminine woman I know she see's it as gross for a man to have anything feminine about himself. Bras I own are wireless/seamless and look like a tank top/wifebeater just in bra form....Barely There is the co i order from and they are tight but comfortable. 

Any advice on approaching this? I asked this in a post quite a time ago but advice given didn't help out too much so thought i'd revisit the topic

Linkback: https://www.gynecomastia.org/forum/index.php?topic=32247.0

hammer

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If your wife being a traditional Christian is thinking about the part of Bible (Old Testament) that says that "a woman shall not wear the clothing of a man, and a man shall not wear the clothing of a woman" Deuteronomy 22:5. She may be taking it to literally.

As a traditional Christian who is born again and is also an ordained Christian Minister, I understand that to mean that you can not dress up in the clothing of the other sex to deceive others.

As a man that has developed breast you are not wearing the bra for the purpose to deceive others, you are wearing it to support breast, and that is exactly what the bra what was designed to do! What does it matter if the breast are on a man or woman?

Good luck and God bless!
Bob

Offline 46bboobs

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If she puts up a fuss you could always ask her to go without her bra for a week or two to she how she likes it.

steven618

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Thanks hammer! Never saw it beyond the plain text myself but yes I assume that would be the argument which i would politely rebuttal with the explanation you provided. I think her main worry is just the non attractiveness of a man in any style of bra. I wear barely there sport like bras that are regular bras just seamless wireless and look identical to a mans tank top. Wear them in black white and gray to match my tank tops and i dont fluff my breasts to give cleavage or anything. 
My fear is 1) loss of attraction 2) obviously estrogen is running rampant and what will this do to my manhood and libido to satisfy my wife and 3) drs and endos have no conclusive reason as why i have significant breast tissue growing so i fear if they get to a b cup or more what the wife wjll say think or feel. I feel when a man develops breasts societal thought says tranny or hormones so i get paranoid over this thinking thats what ppl and even more my wife will think. 

hammer

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If she loves the man she married just for who he is inside, not outside it should not matter! What makes you who you are is in your heart and mind, not your chest or between your legs or anywhere else for that matter, even your bank book!

I lost my testicles, grow 46H size breast, had to go on disability at the age of 40, and now I'm looking at 59 next month, our 5th grandchild is due next summer, I feel as much a man that I did when I was jumping from helicopters in full SCUBA gear in the Navy in my 20's, and I'm still very much in love with my wife of 29 year's as I was the day we said I do!

You know, you can poor gas all over yourself, stand in the garage for as long as you want and you still will never become a car! Same goes with those breast! Just because of some unforseen reason you just happened to grow unwanted breast, doesn't change who you are either!

steven618

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God bless you and such wisdom of facing what knocks so many of us down and out. Guess im just fearful. My wife has said several times in the past if my chest for some reason did grow to be breasts she wouldn't leave me just like as she said shed hope i wouldnt if she lost a leg or whatever but i guess since its a female secondary sexual characteristic and so obvious at a certain point of unable to be hidden i worry if she would be if it legit became a reality which the pains and growth lately i fear it may be. Just wish she wouldnt look sideways at the idea of me wearing a bra cause i know shed love me if they grew to be nothing or DDs but when the bra goes on i know shed be very alarmed and awkward about it. I wore them before and long as she knows she didnt mind so she could prepare but havent worn one for so long i feel she would be put off thinking im flip flopping my want of wearing one vs seeing i need one

Offline aboywithgirls

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I'm wearing a 36G in most of my bras now.  I do wear underwire bras exclusively for the support I get from them. My wife is the same size as me as well. She has come to realize that I can go braless anymore than she could. 
Bras are not for women, they are for breasts. 
Bras aren't for women, they're for breasts.

Offline Paa_Paw

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As long as she does not wear the breastplate of the priesthood while attending the Temple, she is not wearing the garment of the man.  As long as you do not wear the veil, you are abiding by the part of that law that pertains to men.  The scripture cited is taken out of context and relates to what was appropriate for wear at the temple. Out of context and in a totally different time for a totally different purpose.  
Grandpa Dan

Offline TheDane

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If your wife being a traditional Christian is thinking about the part of Bible (Old Testament) that says that "a woman shall not wear the clothing of a man, and a man shall not wear the clothing of a woman" Deuteronomy 22:5. She may be taking it to literally.

As a traditional Christian who is born again and is also an ordained Christian Minister, I understand that to mean that you can not dress up in the clothing of the other sex to deceive others.

As a man that has developed breast you are not wearing the bra for the purpose to deceive others, you are wearing it to support breast, and that is exactly what the bra what was designed to do! What does it matter if the breast are on a man or woman?

Good luck and God bless!
Bob



I believe you cleared up my concerns with this tidbit of info, thanks for clarifying the scriptures a little more.  



steven618

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Thank you all! I guess my fear of them continuing to grow and being only 30 and drs and endos claiming its idiopathic worries me as it seems late 20s early 30s is a very rare occurence of gyno especially noticable growth such as a large a cup. 
I dont fear her as much as i have worn them before and shes not happy so i stop even though she was ok long as i told her bout it ahead of time so shes not taken back by it if she feels it when hugging or something. And if i wore them again im afraid she will think im flip flopping my want of wearing one. Im an avid runner so i wear barely there white gray or navy sports bra like bras no underwire, lacy, push up crap just to keep them still as they are bouncing more. 
Def the mostunderstanding woman ive ever known, perhaps my personal insecurity is hindering my sight of her honest character

Offline MarcoB

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If your wife being a traditional Christian is thinking about the part of Bible (Old Testament) that says that "a woman shall not wear the clothing of a man, and a man shall not wear the clothing of a woman" Deuteronomy 22:5. She may be taking it to literally.

As a traditional Christian who is born again and is also an ordained Christian Minister, I understand that to mean that you can not dress up in the clothing of the other sex to deceive others.

As a man that has developed breast you are not wearing the bra for the purpose to deceive others, you are wearing it to support breast, and that is exactly what the bra what was designed to do! What does it matter if the breast are on a man or woman?

Good luck and God bless!
Bob


I believe you cleared up my concerns with this tidbit of info, thanks for clarifying the scriptures a little more. 

I looked this up in a couple of commentaries I have, and they both said it has to do with what you're communicating.  (I know commentaries are not scripture; but they often give good perspectives to help understand something in scripture.)  How we dress says a lot, whether for example trying to communicate professionalism, or identification with a gang or other rebellious group, a superior financial strata, a military rank, strength, an easy-going aire, whatever.  Dressing as the opposite sex may be trying to communicate something contrary to God's creation, whether for deception, or declaring that we don't accept God's creation, etc..  In my case, while meeting a need, I'm also trying to hide the bra as much as possible, not communicate it; so this cleared my conscience.  OTOH, if you have large breasts that cannot be hidden anyway (or at least not without pain or a risk to health), the whole thing might become a moot point.  The verse was indeed misapplied for centuries to mean women shouldn't wear pants (never mind that their undies were like long pants!).  Do people have the same problem with kilts?  Or, more common in the U.S., a necklace?  (not that it's clothing, nevertheless something that is worn.)

hammer

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If your wife being a traditional Christian is thinking about the part of Bible (Old Testament) that says that "a woman shall not wear the clothing of a man, and a man shall not wear the clothing of a woman" Deuteronomy 22:5. She may be taking it to literally.

As a traditional Christian who is born again and is also an ordained Christian Minister, I understand that to mean that you can not dress up in the clothing of the other sex to deceive others.

As a man that has developed breast you are not wearing the bra for the purpose to deceive others, you are wearing it to support breast, and that is exactly what the bra what was designed to do! What does it matter if the breast are on a man or woman?

Good luck and God bless!
Bob


I believe you cleared up my concerns with this tidbit of info, thanks for clarifying the scriptures a little more. 

I looked this up in a couple of commentaries I have, and they both said it has to do with what you're communicating.  (I know commentaries are not scripture; but they often give good perspectives to help understand something in scripture.)  How we dress says a lot, whether for example trying to communicate professionalism, or identification with a gang or other rebellious group, a superior financial strata, a military rank, strength, an easy-going aire, whatever.  Dressing as the opposite sex may be trying to communicate something contrary to God's creation, whether for deception, or declaring that we don't accept God's creation, etc..  In my case, while meeting a need, I'm also trying to hide the bra as much as possible, not communicate it; so this cleared my conscience.  OTOH, if you have large breasts that cannot be hidden anyway (or at least not without pain or a risk to health), the whole thing might become a moot point.  The verse was indeed misapplied for centuries to mean women shouldn't wear pants (never mind that their undies were like long pants!).  Do people have the same problem with kilts?  Or, more common in the U.S., a necklace?  (not that it's clothing, nevertheless something that is worn.)
During the days that, that was written there wasn't much difference between what a man wore or a woman wore. There were no pants for many years after Chris dead. The kilt was a normal way to dress for males for years long before there were pants!

On another note, men wore jewelry and painted themselves up before women did! So who is it to decide at what point what it is that man share wear and what a woman share wear?

Keep in mind, this is coming from a very extreme conservative person!

Bob

Offline Johndoe1

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I think we also have to remember that God created us and for whatever reason, He has decided that we shall have breasts. Wearing a bra at that point is not blasphemous, since He created us with breasts and we are just wearing what someone with breasts would wear for support and comfort. I don't think Deuteronomy plays into this at any point, since God is the one who created us with breasts. Just a lay persons interpretation.

hammer

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I think we also have to remember that God created us and for whatever reason, He has decided that we shall have breasts. Wearing a bra at that point is not blasphemous, since He created us with breasts and we are just wearing what someone with breasts would wear for support and comfort. I don't think Deuteronomy plays into this at any point, since God is the one who created us with breasts. Just a lay persons interpretation.
You may have a good point there John, or did God create us then either environment or medical situation or medication have more to do with the development of our breast?

But then, at this point,  why worry about the why and the how and just move on and still live life to it fullest!

73's
Bob

Offline Getting boobs

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As I have just started as well and are dealing with some of the same issues, although it sounds like mine is somewhat more accepting than yours. Just sit down and talk, explain your side of it and why. Its an article of clothing that has a purpose, just like socks for your feet. Its not going to make you any less of a man, nor turn you into something else. You need the same thing out if it that she does, because you have the very some things that need support. But just sit her down and talk, its hard to do. But in the end, I think it will work out for the best once she understands the reasons and why.


 

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